NOTES/THOUGHTS/REACTIONS:
I think it's quite obvious at this point that Meyer literally had no idea how to continue this. Which is frankly her own fault. She wrote herself into a corner. That's the problem when you give your characters everything: there's nothing else to write about. Bella got her dream guy, got a perfect baby that she doesn't even have to raise herself, and even gets to keep Jacob in her life! When all is said and done, this should have been the ending to the series. Or better yet, Meyer shouldn't have bothered with this book at all. She literally could have just had Edward and Bella marry at the end of Eclipse, thrown in the baby and had Jacob imprint and that could have been the end. But no, Meyer has to torture us with a long drawn out, waste of paper ending that HAS NO POINT.
So instead of a proper ending we get drivel instead. First half of this chapter is basically devoted to wish fullfillment. Bella gets her own house! In a scene totally stolen out of the original Peter Pan book (if you've only seen the Disney version, Pan and the Lost Boys give Wendy her own cottage) the Cullens show off their wealth and give Bella a new car (never mind that she already had a new one at the beginning of this book) and a new house totally redone and furnished by Esme the super decorater (I've decided amazing decorating is her hidden vampire power).
Much of it is taken up by the Cullens basically tripping over themselves to make Bella happy and congratulating themselves on what awesome gift givers they are. Most of it's nauseating. I totally don't understand this contradictory exchange between Alice and Roselie prompted by Bella asking where Mary Sue baby sleeps:
Alice shrugged. "In Roselie's arms. Or Jacob's. Or Esme's. You get the picture. She has never been set down her entire life. She's going to be the most spoiled half-vampire in existance."
Edward laughed while Roselie took Renesmee expertly in her arms. "She is also the must unspoiled half-vampre in existance," Roselie said. "The Beauty of being one of a kind."
From Breaking Dawn Chapter 24
I guess I'm doing that over-thinking thing that Twihards keep accusing me of because I found so many off things about this exchange. One: her entire life has been a few days. Give it time before you decide she's been spoiled, Alice. Two: Edward doesn't hold his kid at all? Three: there was no need to say she took Renesmee expertly in her arms. Just say she took her into her arms. Stop trying to beat your word count Meyer. Four: She's spoiled? But she's not spoiled? WHAT? What does this exchange even mean? Five: First you she's the most spoiled in existance, which implies there are more of her kind. Then you say the beauty of being one of a kind. Either there are more of her or there aren't. Again: MAKE UP YOUR FREAKING MIND. And finally: what on earth does her being one of a kind have to do with her being spoiled her not? THIS MAKES NO SENSE. This entire exchange makes no freaking sense other then to remind us that Mary Sue baby is a super speshul snowflake. Oh, and I guess it was to lead into the paragraph that had Bella thinking that "oh, me and Roselie ARE still friends! Yay!" Whatever.
As the gift giving goes one Bella still has the same reactions she would have if she were human and she feels relief because you see, she was uber worried that her core self would change after she became a vamp. Okay, yes, a normal person might worry about that. Except that if you read through the books SHE NEVER ONCE WORRIED ABOUT THIS. So this is frankly bull.
Cue vivid description as the Cullens take Bella to her very own cottage. Which is of course perfectly suited to her tastes (if she has any) and utterly wonderful in every way. Because the Cullens could never get anything wrong you see.
Then all the pretty description turns into what we've all (well...not me) been waiting for: vampire sex! Well...the precursor to vampire sex because she literally gets them going hot and heavy like last time and then cuts off to next morning. Oh Meyer, you tease.
Next morning is basically a conversation about how long their sex drive will probably last. Just know it's long. Sigh. Then the chapter abruptly ends with them laughing at something or other in bed. Again, I'm bored.
WORD LIST: acquiescence, beribboned, superlatives
GENERAL ANNOYANCES: Late summer roses bloomed in a handkerchief-sized garden-That must be a really small garden, seeing as how handkerchiefs are about the size of a mini notebook computer. Stupid description.
that his wits-scramblingly beautiful face-Really? You went with that? Again: bad description.
He smiled a wide, gleaming smile-I get it, he smiled. I swear the editors must have been half asleep when they approved this.
No comments:
Post a Comment